Father’s Day

Dads, Daughters, Family, Father's Day, Grandfather, Grandparents

Happy Father’s Day, Dad!

Grandpa Always Makes Me Smile

Dear Dad,

GrandpaJust wanted to say Thank You for being such a wonderful dad. You have always taught me lessons without saying a word. You taught me how to be there for someone you love and what type of man makes a great husband and a great father. You have always provided for our family and always persevered. You showed me the importance of a good work ethic & though you worked long hours up until the time you retired, you demonstrated to me that being happy in your profession can make your entire life turn around. You always have a corny joke or comment for any occasion and though you are not about being the life of the party, our friends and family always gravitate towards you.

I could always count on you, Dad & despite the crazy teenager (& 20-something year old …& 30-something year old) you had to endure, you are still there for me to this day: Fixing things in your crazy McGuyver kind of way, handling things like – the guys at the auto shop, disciplining me which at my age is really considered ‘coaching’. You still insist on double-checking locked doors at night, emptying the trash, carrying heavy items and you are kind enough to not let your eyes glaze over (or fall asleep) when I talk about things that you don’t really have any interest! I’m so grateful for all these gifts you’ve given me. Now, more importantly, for being the best Lolo (Grandpa) ever! I am not sure if you would agree, but maybe all the drama I put you through was so that you could enjoy your first grandbaby! By the looks of it, it was all worth it!

 Lolo & apo 49ers

When J was born, mom teased that you didn’t even know how to hold a baby. Well, let’s face it, the last newborn you held was nearly 40 years ago…You kept asking him why he couldn’t talk & if he was ready to walk. Yes, he could see your face, Dad. But he’s not even First haircut from Grandpaone month old, so you have to be patient! I got to watch you become the modern day Dad: acting goofy, making faces, getting on the floor to play. Things Mom says you never did with my brother and me when we were kids. I’ve never seen you act this way with other kids in our family! You are always sweet to my girl cousins because you feel like little girls need to be babied and treated with extra special care. You have had a special bond with them in that way, like little princesses to dote on and watch over. With J it’s different: You actually can’t wait to see each other. You crack each other up. You guys are best friends. Even though J is just learning to talk now, he asks for you. He looks for you when you are not around. He screams at the top of his lungs when he finally gets to see you!

You’re the Best Dad & Grandfather ever! I love you, Dad!!!

Dads, Daughters, Father's Day

Salamat po (Thank you) Dad

Salamat Po, Tatay

IMG_12382644396343Dear Tatay (Dad in Tagalog, national filipino dialect),

We might not have the typical daughter father relationship but I do cherish our bond that we have and want you to know how much you are appreciated this Father’s Day and everyday.

Thank you for always being there for me no matter what and always having my back even when I might have been wrong at certain times. (Lol not gonna divulge this info)

Thank you for always listening to what I have to say even though I can be repetitive. It’s always comforting to know I can count on you a phone call away.

Thank you for teaching me how to play basketball, sing karaoke (lol Calendar Girl song is still ringing in my ears), drive a car young, save my money, be thrifty, make good deals, be on time (I was always on time before I had kids), cook random dishes with whatever ingredients we had in the refrigerator/pantry, and always smile at any situation. These skills are instilled in my everyday life because it allows me to appreciate the little things in life and not having to keep up with the Joneses but building a strong family foundation and good nest egg for my family and future.

Thank you for always hustling and making sacrifices for our family growing up. This trait helped me always to be a hustler (hard worker) no matter what I’m doing from being a working mama, stay at home mama, working at home mama. I love striving to be the best for my family.

Thank you for teaching me how to speak tagalog, even though I can’t speak it fluently I can still comprehend so it’s nice to be able to respond to other Filipinos/Filipinas. Haha sometimes it gives me upgrades and discounts when I speak tagalog (another saving tip).

Thank you for always being chill, cool, calm, collected and not sweating the small stuff when there is any negativity surrounding you. You helped teach me to just choose to be happy and not over think situations because life is too short to not want to focus on all the positive there is.

I’m very grateful to have a father like you and proud to have you as my father and wish you a Happy Father’s Day.


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Dads, Father's Day, Parenting

Stuff My Dad Says

What seemed like my dad just playing tricks on me when I was little, now seems more like imparted wisdom for parenting…with a sarcastic twist. I find myself as a parent laughing at situations others wouldn’t, making jokes and getting my kids to think about it and come to their own conclusions.
Maybe the gift of laughter is not just a coping mechanism but the better way to see the brighter side of life. Maybe in the long run being serious is not as important as enjoying the people you are with, maybe being right isn’t as important as raising children to think for themselves.
Where to start?…. I am in the backseat with my twin sister, windows rolled down, hair blowing in the breeze when we come to a stop light. My father gently turns to look over his shoulder and say as rubs his bald head, “ you know girls, I stuck my head out the window when I was your age and it clear fell off.” My sister and I look in horror at each other and quit squirming around, sit up straight in our seat…. brilliant dad, I think my sis and I were scared of wind until we were 12. Then the absolute freedom at 13, you can stick your head in the wind and it won’t fall off!
My father had an aneurysm when my sister and I were almost 2, consequently it left a scar… my sister and I were arguing with my mother. My father speaks to us later before tucking us in and points to his head which has a dent and long scar. “You know girls…” points to his scar and says’ “This is what happened when I mouthed off to your mother, she hit me over the head with a frying pan.”
Not all of them were this serious, my father goes upstream instead of down that path of despair. At one time our father was a salesman for tractor equipment and thus would have to visit farmers. My sister and I would accompany him. On these road trips maybe to Montana or Idaho somewhere in the mountains You have to remember, this was the time before texting, apps, and facebook or instagram. We were Bored, yes with a capital B. Again looking over his shoulder he would say, “Hey girls,” pointing to the yellow sign to the right that says falling rock, “Look out for the little indian boy named Falling Rock.” To our utter disappointment there was never a little boy dressed in leather on the side of the road. But at least it took up one of the 9 hours.
Now skip to the road trip I am taking with my 3 boys driving from Nashville to spring break in Florida, it is two hours in, 3 squirmy worms. I say “Hey boys” looking over my right shoulder, “ If you go to sleep, it will make the car go faster.” They all squeeze their eyes shut and fall asleep only to wake up 100 hundred miles closer. ”Wow!” They are thrilled, and this worked a good few more long trips.
Then 2 of the 3 are fighting over a Spiderman toy and I pull them aside and put Spiderman on top of the fridge. “Spiderman is really misbehaving and I think he should go to timeout.”   The boys start talking about how to make Spidey share.
Happy Father’s Day, Dad – You make parenting so much more fun.
Father's Day, Grandfather

My Papa

One of my first memories of my father was when I think I was about 3 years old. My grandmother told me to answer the door at her house. I open the door to a complete stranger and was told that the man standing in front of me was my father. I remember being so confused and I had absolutely no feelings for this man. Over the years, I would get visits from this stranger. I guess STRANGEr is the perfect word for him. He was strange. He liked to take me to his local bar to play pool and to cemeteries to walk around and look at tomb stones. He was a severe alcoholic and it progressed through the years into a very serious drug addiction.

Throughout my life, I experienced some very traumatic things with him until finally, he did something so terrible that I had to remove him from my life permanently. I really don’t know if he is even still alive because the last time I saw him was 20 years ago. Thankfully, I never had an empty spot left from his absence. I had my Papa.

My grandpa was an angel in my life in more ways than anyone could know. He was the first man and the only man for years and years of my life who truly loved me. He was a completely selfless man. He was so simple in so many ways, from the way he dressed to the cars he drove: He never worried about impressing others.  He always made me feel special and loved. He showed me that men can be good, in fact much more than ‘good’! He loved me when I was at my worst and making horrible decisions left and right.

A few weeks before he died he gave me a huge gift. He knew he wasn’t going to be here much longer so he told me everything I needed to hear from him. He told me that he was so proud of the woman I had become and proud of all the hurdles that I had crossed. He made sure I really knew just how much he loved me. To this day I miss him so much. But I am so thankful that he filled me up with so much of his love that I can hold on tightly to it through the rest of my life.

Papa, I love you. I look forward to a day we can be together again. Your love is with me  every day and I will always cherish it.

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